Being Thankful And Giving Thanks

Grandma Pearl with my Uncle Kavin
and cousin Ryan, showing off the
yeast rolls they made

My grandma passed away in January at the age of 92. Since her passing, I really haven't blogged. I haven't done my usual Silent Sunday posts, and I haven't given my thoughts or perspective on what's been going on in the world. I just couldn't do it.

When Leonard Nimoy passed away just a few weeks after my grandma, I took it really hard.

Really. Hard.

I never met the man, and didn't know him personally, but his passing felt deeply personal to me. I felt a loss that I couldn't then, and still can't to this day, explain. All this is leading me to the subject of my post.

Today is Thanksgiving. A day where people get together with family or friends (or both) and enjoy life. They don't have to buy anything, they don't have to feel pressure to come with a gift. They simply come as they are.

Today is a day to be thankful for what you have. So, in the spirit of the day, I'm going to be as thankful as I possibly can for all the things I have, and try to find the hidden joy in the sadness that will surely try to creep in.

I will find the joy in the 36 years I had with my grandma. I will remember all the wonderful, loving things she did for me, for my brothers and cousins, for her children and extended family. I will not dwell on her absence.

I will remember all the Thanksgivings of my childhood with my large family all gathered around the giant franken-table in my grandma's dining room and kitchen. There were five kids, three sets of parents, and a set of grandparents (plus usually a minimum of two dogs roaming the house and) circling the table.

There was always so much food and laughter. I don't remember any specific conversations, just an overwhelming sensation of being loved, happy, fed, and cared for.

So, today, I am thankful for all the memories I am blessed with to keep me warm when the chill of sadness tries to move in.

Today I am making it a goal to help build memories with my girls so they have something to chase the chill away.

Because I am determined to stay warm today.

And I hope you can stay warm today, too.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

It's NaNoWriMo Time Again

We have, yet again, come 'round to the Month of November.

For some this means more facial hair (or the unsuccessful attempt at more) in their lives, whether it's on their own face or their partner's. The photos and status updates have been... interesting, thus far.

For others it means Thanksgiving is fast approaching and so is all the excitement/joy/family togetherness/stress/anxiety/depression that goes along with it. My Facebook feed is filling up with posts about what people are thankful for, and what they plan to make for their big family gettogether.

Then there's the group who realize it's go time. That novel they planned to write "someday" isn't going to write itself. Those are the NaNoWriMo-ers. Those are the people who ignore everything but their notebooks or computers and the voices in their heads telling them to "WRITE, WRITE, WRITE!"

I am in my fifth year of NaNo, and while I'm struggling to get my word count (the goal is 50k in 30 days) I know I still have time to catch up. It's only the 6th after all. I'm letting my novel lead this time, and already in the first 1200 words, I've had two major surprises. I'm starting to like my novel. It's taking longer than usual, but it is happening, and for that I am thankful.

Silent Sunday

Wordless Wednesday